


You Make Blue My Favourite Colour

by deltachye



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Flowers, Gift Fic, Language of Flowers, One Shot, Post-Break Up, Reader-Insert, he's sooo sooo so pretty omfg, ily tsu
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-04-04
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:01:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,131
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23483500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deltachye/pseuds/deltachye
Summary: [reader x tsumugi tsukioka]Forgiveness is the scent of the violet under the heel that has crushed it.[dw]
Relationships: Tsukioka Tsumugi/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 72
Collections: Gift Fics





	You Make Blue My Favourite Colour

Snagging a part-time job with accommodation at a flower shop on Veludo Way was probably one of your best achievements to date. Real estate in this part of town was impossible to come by, but the owner had taken a real shining to you and hired you after the interview. They had a studio above for you to rent, so everything had been smooth sailing… until a particular street act caught your eye.

“How could you do this to our father?!”

You’d gotten fairly used to the drama community setting up shop outside since starting work. Rotating the bouquets outside, you turned around to see who was performing. Their backs were to you on that particular side of the road, but they’d amassed quite the crowd. You were no theatre expert, but the projection of their voices were loud and emotional. They were probably good.

“I already told you that I’m not going back, Kaiji.”

The cold swept over you before you even realized why. With a loose, stunned grip you accidentally dropped the watering can, spilling water all over your shoes. You swore and ducked, picking it up before any more damage was done. When you rose back up, the couple blocking your view had walked away, and there he was. Twin sapphires passed over and then locked with your eyes.

How dare he show his face to you again.

\---

The next day was the first that you didn’t want to go to work. You debated calling in sick, but you’d feel awful for not giving your boss enough leeway to find a replacement, so you rolled out of bed and counted down the miserable seconds until your shift started. You hadn’t slept a wink. God, you felt horrible and you probably looked it, too.

For a couple of hours, the morning business was as usual. You sold a few bouquets and chatted with other customers. Kept busy, you didn’t have much room for thought. It was almost enough time for you to forget the slip of dread.

Almost.

“Wel… come.”

“…hi, [Name].”

You bit down on your lip, gnawing on it. Tsumugi stared back at you just as awkwardly. He didn’t look much different, not having grown, keeping the same soft dark hair and face… in fact he looked like he’d just walked out of your memory into today. He wore a tan coat with blue accents on the sleeves that complimented his eyes, but you refused to look into them, fearing that you’d lose yourself like a sailor lost at sea. You glowered at your feet.

“I guess you’re back in town,” you prompted caustically when he didn’t say anything.

“Yeah,” he replied softly. His voice had always been so quiet. “I… just moved back.”

“Okay.”

“I saw you yesterday,” he continued in your silence, trying to sound upbeat. “During the street act. It was a big surprise.”

“Yeah, you could say that.” You kicked a leaf, squashing it under your sole.

“Tasuku and I didn’t know you worked so close.”

“Tasuku…” It’d been a while since you’d seen him, too. Though you hadn’t talked to him, you didn’t harbour any ill will against him, unlike the meek man with the audacity to stand before you right now.

“We, uh… joined a troupe. Together. Nearby.” The mood was so tense you felt like you were actively being choked. You grimaced.

“So you’re acting again.”

“Yeah. And I wanted to, uh… talk to you again.”

“Oh. So _now_ you want to talk to me?”

The wall you had so carefully been building toppled and the waves of emotions poured out of you. It took everything you had not to scream at him or pull out your hair.

“You can’t just _dump me_ without saying a _single_ word and then crawl back here, all high and mighty, you _jerk_!”

He winced, flinching back. You were shaking. There were no words that could tell him how angry you were. This was just a fraction of the anguish you had felt all those years ago, too. It was all coming back. All your efforts to put that away were shattering, and you were drowning in it.

“I know,” he whispered, his eyes heavy. You finally found the courage to look at his face. He’d always had this delicateness about him that made his sadness sheer, like ice. Even his voice was clear despite its grief. “No matter what, I could never apologize enough.”

“Then why, pray tell, are you here? Is it to make yourself feel better?”

“No, of course not! I just… I really am sorry. Every part of me regrets what I’ve done to you and how badly I’ve hurt you.”

His words rolled off of you like water. It’s far too little, far too late. But he’s holding a bouquet that you’ve only just noticed, somehow, despite its size. You turn your nose up at it.

“Blue hydrangeas? Apology? You’re kidding, right?”

“I’m not asking you to forgive me or give me a second chance. But I can’t just leave things the way I did.”

“Oh, thanks!” you replied sarcastically, hating how he kept wincing every time you raised your voice at him as if he didn’t deserve it. “Flowers to erase years of trauma by getting ditched by my boyfriend. Awesome. I am _healed_ , Tsumugi.”

“Anything you want to say to me, you can.” His lashes obscured his irises, but they swum with grief. You were biting your lip so hard you tasted the blood.

“I have _nothing_ to say to you.”

He nodded, mostly to himself. Head down, he held the flowers out. You stared at them condescendingly.

“I’m not taking those,” you said out loud when he didn’t move. He opened his mouth, seemingly having something to say before the bells at the door chimed. The two of you jumped. A pair of high school girls chatted to each other as they walked in.

“Hello,” they said politely. You swallowed past the lump in your throat.

“Welcome,” you replied numbly, unable to access your customer service voice. You shot another look to Tsumugi, who had stiffened up. He let out a soft sigh, noticing the counter behind you. He walked forwards, and you shuffled backwards, skirting him to maintain a distance. He laid the flowers down gently.

“I hope that we can talk to each other again. At the very least, just as acquaintances. I can’t ask anything of you, I know. It’s not fair of me. But I… I really did miss you.” He bowed and then left after that before you could hurl any one of the insults rattling in your skull at him. You felt the tears prickling at your eyes, but the girls were waving for your attention, and you had to pull yourself together.

Screw him. He’s done nothing but cause you grief. The flowers lay on the counter, untouched.

\---

“So, what are you going to do?”

“What did _you_ do?”

You stared down at the wilting flowers, unable to touch them, afraid of what might happen if you did. A curse? Tasuku sighed, pulling back the sleeves of his grey hoodie. He had swung by in the middle of a jog, apparently. The two of you had never been as close as him and He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, but during the course of your relationship, Tasuku and you had formed a pretty good friendship. You had no idea that he also worked on Veludo Way, though, only ever knowing that he was planning to act professionally after college. Catching up with him had been a lot easier, but the two of you couldn’t go any further without addressing the elephant—in this case, browning hydrangeas—in the room.

“Honestly? I forgave him.”

Your brow furrowed, and you had to look up at him. His square jaw was tense, but his expression was genuine.

“Why?” you demanded, feeling betrayed.

“We work in the same troupe and room together. It’s not like I can resent him forever. Besides, he’s actually stepping up for once. He has changed, [Name]. I know he does feel bad about it.”

“It’s not enough to just feel bad,” you mumbled sullenly, dropping your chin into your palms. You knew you were sounding childish, but weren’t you right to when the love of your life packs up and vanishes without a word before waltzing back like nothing happened?

“I just think—this is just my humble opinion—just hear him out. That’s all. You don’t even have to forgive him or anything, but it might give you a little bit more closure to hear what he has to say.”

“I can’t believe you of all people are telling me to do this.”

“It’s not good for the soul to keep hatred pent up.” He smiled wryly and reached over, knocking you in the shoulder. He still didn’t know how to control his damn jockiness and you scowled, rubbing the sore spot. “It’s good to see you again, though. You look well.”

“You too, Tasuku. Are you leaving?”

“Yeah, I’ve got a morning rehearsal. So? What do you want me tell him?”

Your eyes drifted back down to the hydrangeas below you. They had a sweet perfume to them, their large petals having a quiet beauty against striking green leaves. With a begrudging groan, you closed your eyes.

“ _Fine_ , you win. I’ll meet with him. _Once_. Only because you asked.”

“’Atta girl. I’ll text you what he says.”

He left. You glanced at your phone instinctively. Your heart was racing in your chest. It’d been… how long since you’d sat down with Tsumugi like this? The very last time hadn’t been very pleasant; he was distant, still over-occupied with his failed audition. He was probably thinking about how he was going to leave you in your sleep, then, too. And you hadn’t exactly dated any other men since then, so you were having stupid high school crush flutters all over again.

Irrationally upset, it was all you could do to occupy your mind by scrubbing down the shop top to bottom. An elderly woman came in later, looking for carnations. When you went to pick them out, she commented,

“These flowers are just so beautiful. I love hydrangeas!”

“Mm,” you replied, strained, avoiding looking at the clipped flowers displayed in the glass vase.

\---

“I’m really thankful you agreed to meet with me.”

“I couldn’t say no to Tasuku,” you replied bluntly, knocking back your drink to steel your nerves. Tsumugi laughed awkwardly.

“Right… he does have a commanding force…”

“So?” you asked coldly. You had no intention of making this easy for him by acting nice. “What?”

“There’s really nothing I can say to justify my actions.” He turned his body to face you, but you kept staring down at the bar, leaning away. “I should’ve done more… I wish I could go back and change everything. I hated myself every day for what I did.”

“Oh.” You stirred your ice. “It’s too bad phones and e-mails don’t exist. It’s almost like you could’ve called or something in between then and now. Dang.”

“I was afraid,” he admitted. “Every day that passed, I just felt like… I deserved to talk to you less and less. So I just accepted hating myself. For that, I’ll forever be sorry. I am so sorry, [Name].”

You glanced over, looking at the top of his head as he bowed to you. You were glad he wasn’t looking, because even _now_ , even after all he had done to tear your heart to shreds—your first name in his mouth made your heart ache longingly.

“Okay. I heard your apology. Are we done?”

You had to get out of here. The booze was burning like acid in your stomach, making your blood warm, and staying any longer might end up with you sobbing and causing a public disturbance. Tsumugi reached into his jacket pocket, placing something on the bar under his hand. He slid it over and you spied the box warily.

“It’s… something I meant to give you back then. I’ve always held onto it, so, I figured…” He trailed off. Bitterly, you reached over and snapped the felt box open.

“…a ring?”

It was a silver band with a single dainty blue sapphire smiling back at you. With your heart floundering in the pit of your stomach, you looked over to him.

“You were going to propose?” you asked dangerously.

“What? No! No, it’s not an engagement r—I’m sorry, I should’ve… ugh. I know what it looks like now. I just thought that it suited you, so I bought it, but then…” He fanned his red face guiltily. “I’m sorry.”

He was tripping over his words so badly that you wondered if he was wasted despite drinking nothing but water. You glanced back down at the ring. It was gorgeous, of course, but you didn’t know if you could take it in good conscience. Leave it to this idiot to give you a ring and not realize the implications.

“Why did you keep it for all this time?” you asked, finally settling on which question to ask. He gulped down some water, trying to regain his composure.

“I don’t know, honestly. But I could never get rid of it.” In your spiteful silence, he continued, under his breath. “I’ve always cared about you, even if it didn’t seem that way. No matter how much you hate me, I hate myself more.”

“Do you want my pity or something?”

He shook his head frantically. “God, no. I don’t ask anything of you. I just wanted to finally give it to you.”

“Keep it.” You snapped the box shut before it could tempt you any further and slid it back across the bar to him. “I’m going home.”

“O-oh—[Name], wait—”

“ _What_?” You were already shrugging your jacket back on. “I heard you out. I held up my end of the deal. We’re done, aren’t we?”

“I…” He sucked in a deep breath. “I’m not going to give up on you this time.”

You froze. “What does that mean?”

“It means that I’m going to keep trying. You can push me away forever, and you can never return my feelings, but _I_ … I have no place to say this, I know, but I’ll always love you. I always have since then. I have a feeling that I always will. Even if it takes me a lifetime, I’m going to try and win you back, [Name].”

You were speechless. Here he was, acknowledging that he of all people has _no right_ to say that to you, but he was also staring at you with such a fierce determination that you wanted to shrink away. He had never seemed so… _present_ before. Willing. All of his attention was turned to you. It made you feel that there was no way he was going to lose.

“Whatever,” was all you could manage. You left quickly after that so that you didn’t have to be under his oppressive gaze any more. Your heart was racing, and it wasn’t from liquor.

\---

Apparently, he was keen on keeping his promises now, and appeared in the store the next day. He had a new bouquet with him. Your stomach twisted painfully.

“I didn’t know if you still liked these,” he confessed, setting them down in front of you. You clenched your fingers into fists. They _were_ still your favourite flower. He’d remembered well.

“You have some nerve to bring another business’ product into another store,” you grumbled, avoiding the topic.

“I didn’t say I didn’t have any business here.” He placed some notes on the counter beside the bouquet. Your jaw was locked so tightly you thought you were going to break your teeth. “I’ll take some lilies from that display. I don’t have any orange flowers in my room yet.”

Reluctantly, you slipped off your stool and walked over to where he’d gestured. You pulled the first few you saw and wrapped them up, handing them to him without looking at his face.

“Thanks.” He remained cordial even in the face of your sour temper. “I’ll see you again tomorrow.”

“You will?” you asked, raising an eyebrow. You hadn’t meant to respond, hoping to keep a pretense of a cold shoulder, but his casual nonchalance pissed you off so badly you had to answer. He was smirking. _This mother—_

“I will. Bye.”

He left, and you were _fuming_.

\---

He came as promised, at around the same time. You ignored his bouquet of flowers yet again—this time, it was a bunch of fresh narcissus blossoms, or “rebirth”—and handed him his purchase. You managed to keep completely silent, but he ignored your silence, acting as if you were all buddy-buddy. He had always been a great actor and you hated him for it. Stupid man.

In the evening, you were sweeping outdoors when you caught sight of his familiar frame. Scowling, you already had a line in mind to tell him off when you noticed a woman at his arm. She was pretty, with long brown hair and a cute face. They held grocery bags together, chatting with ease. In awe, you could only gawk, frozen in the spot as they passed you. What had he bought today…?

Red roses.

You went back inside and sat down. Staring at the yellow flowers, you wanted nothing more than to tear them up with your bare hands and stomp on the pieces. But you would never do that to such beautiful plants, so instead, you put your face in your hands and cried.

\---

“Tsumugi, what’s your game? What do you want from me?”

“I told you. I’m not giving u—”

“You have other women!” you exploded as you clipped flower stalks, unable to keep it locked in your chest any longer. You were lucky that the store was empty, because there was no way you could’ve avoided this melt down. You slammed your hands down in frustration. “Okay?! I’m _fine_ without you, so could you please just leave me alone like you always have!? I’m _sick_ of you!”

“Other… oh. You must’ve seen me with my director, huh?” He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly—a nervous tic he still had, apparently. “Trust me. I haven’t exactly been… out there… since our relationship.”

“As if I could ever trust you again—ow! Damn it.” You dropped the shears you’d been working with, accidentally slicing through your finger in your angry daze. A ball of ruby red swelled, rolling down the side of your finger. It throbbed painfully.

“Are you okay? You’re bleeding.” He stepped forwards, concerned, but you whirled away from him.

“I said leave me _alone_!”

“I can’t.”

He had reached forwards and was squeezing a handkerchief around your finger. His fingertips were chilly around yours, but they warmed themselves from your own heat. He stared down at your intertwined hands wistfully, a sad smile on his face. He looked down at you, and it was then that you realized he seemed so much taller than you.

“I can’t leave you alone, [Name]. Not when I already know what I’ve lost.”

“I…”

You had done pretty well so far to not cry in front of him, but this was the last straw. He pulled you forwards as your vision blurred. Powerless, you couldn’t fight him as he placed another hand on your back, rubbing soothing circles. You sobbed into his chest.

“I _hate_ you!” you wailed, your cries muffled by his shirt. “How could you just leave me like that!?”

“I know.” His voice rumbled in his chest, louder with your ear pressed up to his heart. It was hoarse. “I know.”

“I missed you so much! I thought you hated _me_ … every day I wondered what I did wrong.”

“I never hated you.” While your eyes were closed, you felt the bottom of his chin rest against the top of your head. “And it was all my fault. I have always, always loved you.”

“Then why…?”

“I was stupid. Afraid. I know. I’m sorry.”

You stayed like that for a while until you cried yourself out, drained. Pulling back, Tsumugi unwrapped his handkerchief around your finger. No new blood appeared, and you withdrew your hand awkwardly, sniffling. There was nothing and everything to say, so you just kept your mouth shut.

“Do you have band-aids?”

“…yeah.”

“Where?”

“…behind the counter in the drawer.”

“Can I go get them?”

You sighed wearily. There was no energy left in you and you nodded. He had you sit on your stool, wiping away dried blood with an alcohol wipe. You winced when it passed over your fresh cut, stinging sharply.

“Sorry.” With utmost care, he wrapped your finger in a band-aid. His touch on your skin was absolutely electrifying, and you still felt the ghost of his hand on yours when he moved back. You flexed your fingers once he was done. He reached out and caught your fingers.

“Wh—”

He laid a chaste kiss over top your nails before letting go. His eyes weren’t shy—far from it. He bravely looked up at you, smiling imperceptibly.

“So that it gets better quickly.”

You knew then that you were fighting an uphill battle, and you were already starting to lose.

\---

“Tsumugi,” you declared the second he walked through the door. He had purple tulips (loyalty) tucked under his arm, but you ignored him. On your feet, you stormed over to him and held out your fist, bandage still in place.

“Rock paper scissors. If I win, you get out of my sight and never talk to me again.”

“Wait, wh—?!”

“If you win, we go out. Got it?”

“[Name]!” he replied frantically, obviously panicked. “You can’t just—”

“On go. Rock, paper, sc—”

“I’m throwing paper.”

On ‘go’, you stared down at your splayed fingers. You had for sure thought you were going to do rock, but somehow, your fingers had twitched open into paper. Your eyes slid over to his hand, large and slender. Scissors.

“You win,” you replied expressionlessly. “You’re still good at this, I guess.”

“Wait… did you do this knowing that I’d—”

“I can’t get over you either,” you interjected, staring up at him. The least he owed you was the right to talk. “I’ve tried. All this time. After what you did to me, I should’ve… I don’t know. But I never did. I’ve missed you all this time. I have every right to hate you, and I do, but… ugh. I just can’t. I miss you too much.”

“[Name]…” He looked absolutely shocked, as if this wasn’t what he’d been struggling so hard to hear from you all this time. Your face was hot.

“So I’ll take your ring, okay?”

“Ring…”

“The ring!” you snapped, hating him for being so slow on the uptake. You held your palm out demandingly. “As a promise!”

“Wh—oh!” He scrambled in his pockets, juggling the tulips between his hands. You knew that he’d still have the box on him. He handed it over to you. You popped the blue felt back open and stuck the ring onto your ring finger—surprisingly, it fit very well, only a touch loose.

“You see this?!” You shoved your left hand into his face, pointing aggravatedly at the ring. “You promised me! You’re going to make it up to me and more, right?! And you’re never going to leave me again. Right?!”

“R-Right!” he stammered, leaning back with your force. His wondrous expression split and suddenly he was laughing. The sight of it made your insides do a steam wash cycle, but for the sake of appearances, you kept your adoration to yourself. He reached out, grabbing your left hand. With the same delicateness he had kissing your cut, he kissed the ring, raising his eyes to yours.

“I promise. I will never leave you again.”

“You swore on it,” you mumbled, jerking your hand back. You reached out, refusing to meet his gaze. “Gimme the stupid flowers. I want to put them in a vase while they’re fresh.”

“You’re kind of a—”

“A what?!”

“N-nothing!” He laughed again, a full-bodied one that narrowed his eyes and made you smile, too. “I’m just really, really glad.”

Later, when you’ve healed a bit more, you’d be able to tell him that you were glad, too. Immensely glad. Overwhelmingly glad that he had come back to you and still loved you. Right now, you were still hurting, but you had a feeling that he’d put you back together in no time. The blue gem was iridescent on your finger. Blue… it was a sad, pensive colour, but it also represented royal pride.

Tsumugi had made blue your favourite colour.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: https://deltachye.tumblr.com/


End file.
